5 Tips for When You Just Can’t Adult

You know when you hit that wall in life that you just cannot summon the energy to scale it? No matter how much inspiration you seek, no matter how much sleep you get, no matter how much wine you drink you just can’t budge. The inertia of the weight of all the things on your to-do list, the day-to-day minutiae of your life just grinds and you end up treading water until that spark reappears to propel you forward. And you know that the spark will come…you just have to get through the current fog.

That’s been my life these last few days, actually weeks…oh who am, I kidding it’s been months! Fuck winter and fuck my lazy backside for staying so sedentary.

I was lamenting all things first world problems with my sister-in-law today who has just weathered the mother of all shit storms…the house move. So she’s living amid chaos and boxes in a fabulous new house that is just begging for her interior decorating touch…just as soon as she gets the boxes out of the hallway, the bedroom and the over-sized laundry.

There we were spluttering our way through a shared depressive language and she listed off five things that she finds useful to get through the crap days.  “It’s the little things you need,” she said. Wise. ‘Cos little is all one can manage at times like this, am I right?

Here they are:

  1. Get a $20 Chinese massage. You know those dodgy looking shoulder rub places that are everywhere? Pop in and put your feet up for 30 minutes. Close your eyes and let their expert hands and elbows (& feet if that’s your thing) pummel away the weight hanging on. Nothing beats a good shoulder rub!
  2. Invest in one luxury cosmetic (like lipstick). If you can manage nothing else in your day a slathering of a gorgeous new shade on your lips with dark sunglasses can propel you through just about anything.
  3. Get decent active wear. Not the stretchy, loosey goosey after one wash stuff – but the good brand, strong suction power tights that make you feel like Sporty Spice the minute you hike them up. Active wear is one step closer to actually being…you know… active, even if you can’t move your butt off the couch.
  4. Walk out of the house. Even for 10 minutes around the block. Leave the four walls of your cloudy comfort zone and take in some fresh air…before returning to the couch and the remote control.

And finally she revealed the mother of all ‘can’t be fucked with adulting’ tips.

  1. PJs or Day Wear…you decide!

    Turn your PJs into daywear. Don’t buy traditional pyjamas, buy casual loose daywear (K-Mart couture, I call it) and sleep in that then if you wake up on the wrong side of bed you can afford to not get dressed all day (just add your new lipstick perhaps) and you’ll look somewhat respectable when you open the door for your latest delivery from e-Bay (because, let’s face it, when you haven’t left the house in a week, these deliveries are your life source).

So when life feels overwhelming and you just want to hide in your blanket fort try one of these ‘go to’ tips instead. It’s the little things that may just reignite that spark.

I’m off to Kmart.

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